I have been observing for quite awhile now that everyone (me included) cannot appreciate anything at all until they come into an understanding about that thing. What is the cause of it? I search into the mind and the answer that I get at this moment is “what’s in for me” factor.
If I don’t get a satisfactory answer to my question, I would not appreciate your answer. If I am in a desperate state for an answer (which I already know what answer I wish to have – only if I am conscious) I would not appreciate an answer that is pointing me to the truth, in other words, a painful answer that is showing me the falseness that I am holding on. I would only appreciate an answer that is supportive of my view. Is that familiar to you?
In the same way if you are reading this blog and all you want is the truth, nothing but the truth, you will read what I write here with much enthusiasm and even having self-inquring and reflection after reading it. But if you wish to have a quick-fix answer to your life issues (which I also do once awhile), you would not appreciate what I am writing here. That is fine too. For we only choose what we want to listen.
So if I want to hear support, I will only look for support. If I want to hear the truth, I will only look for the truth. So a yardstick for me to know what idea I am having is to look around me. The world is my reflection. In the same way, if what you share is something I like, I am happy for you. If it is something that is making me upset, I am not happy with you, though that thing may be pointing me to the Truth. That is the human dilemma – consistently wanting something to feed what’s in for me.
I came across many people telling me that they start to appreciate what I have shared years ago. That statement also mean that they were not appreciative when the sharing was done at that point of time. That is true as when we don’t understand what we hear, we cannot induce any appreciation. Even though we may think we understood what we heard, the appreciation of that point of time and after our personal realization is entirely different. I would say that moment of hearing is not much of appreciation but rather an expression of thanks. Appreciation has the cause of understanding and confidence.
Appreciation is not for anyone else except the experiencer. I can’t really appreciate you, though the expression seems to be pointing to you. What I am truly saying is “I am appreciative for the understanding that I have gotten and I am sharing this news with you (as I thought you are the cause of it)”.
Many a times people came to me with their “house on fire”, and surprisingly not many wishes to hear the Truth except for a quick-fix answer. At times they are not even keen in seeking the reasons of their suffering except to pour out their grievances. In other words they are not keen in solving their pain except for a relief. That is the irony of human suffering. And all is about what’s in for me, rather that what’s the Truth for me. And I have people coming back to me with this question – how would I know what is the Truth? Or how do you know that is the Truth?
There is nothing in Truth – truth is not a place. Truth is not something that belongs to you or me. Truth is simply an understanding that sets me free. If I am not free I can be sure I am not living the Truth.