A Matter of Opinion, or PERCEPTION
Posted on 21 June 2011 | No responses
Everyone is a genius – you believe in what the mind perceived and in that reality you can either see yourself or others, as stupid, or, genius. If one knows stupidity is merely a perception of the mind and does not truly defines him, then he is a genius by that token, whereas the other who thinks he is actually a genius without recognizing it was merely perception playing out, is indeed stupidity.
Both stupidity or genius, when the dream is over, is merely a … perception, personalized only by you. Are you a genius to recognize that?
A fool with a sense of his foolishness
is — at least to that extent — wise.
But a fool who thinks himself wise
really deserves to be called
a fool.Dhammapada 63
Compromise Uncertainty
Posted on 21 June 2011 | No responses
I attended the first phase Ascension Workshop last weekend and find their method of addressing defilements, or ‘grooves’ as they put it, interesting and refreshing. Other than the experience of meditation that emphasizes on open and close eyes meditation, not having any particular rigid way of sitting, and yes, also lying down meditation which is much encouraged throughout the day; what etched deeply in my mind is the statement made by the monk at the end of the session which comes in the form of a question – the original question given by the founder, MSI, that inspired many more to take on this journey: Which area in your life have you compromised?
I find the question relevant and profound – in fact, it points towards the direction of human suffering that each of us try to resolve or escape from in our daily basis, if not every moment of our lives, and yet not fully finding a foolproof way of ending suffering that leads to everlasting peace. Normally we tend to relate compromise with sacrifice as in not honouring our hearts but to be subjugated to things we are not happy to do. Yet, strangely, even if there are truly moments of happiness, guilt may appear asunder, throwing us off balance from what we are already enjoying – hence compromising ourselves again. And even if there is no conscious guilt present, the unknowing mind may have compromised in taking on lesser happiness for the higher, simply just to feed the need of what has been repressed or addicted earlier.
It can be a common dilemma of choosing what is good for one’s health over food that we like and making a compromise within not to repeat it again. Or to resign to a situation of conflict that we are not ready to face so as not to stir up the worst in us though we very well know that the best may emerge from it subsequently. There are even situations where we do not have the clarity to choose what is truly best for us, having both equal pros and cons for each possibility, hence bringing us into situations where confusion reigns and regretting later the choices we have made.
What is it that you really, really, want – asked another teacher of mine. And he reiterated further that if one is truly one-minded about it, then guilt or compromise will not surface. But his question is tricky and profound as what we usually want, be it money, relationship, career, health, etc., is constantly about something to cover-up what we do not want – to mean that what we want is to fix what we do not want – though that is not the essence of his question. What I am trying to say is that what we think we really, really want may not be the very root of our want. We only focus on what we don’t want and make demands around it. It is ignorance of what is there and finding ways of not facing it. So a truer question will be – what is it that you are ignoring that makes you compromise on your peace? Do you know?
Just by attending to this one question, or any similar question for that matter that directs one to self-inquiry; the mystery of life’s suffering will see its end – perhaps not when one is not ready on the pursuit for Truth and nothing but the Truth. What is Truth then? Suffering and the end of suffering. Don’t you think compromise is suffering?
It was Never about the Cats
Posted on 20 June 2011 | No responses
Months ago, an expectant feline found sanctuary at the halfway staircase leading to our cultivation centre and gave birth to four little kittens. This is the second occurrence where another cat came in to give birth. It was simply a gesture of kindness to permit both the feline and its kitties to stay on for no one really knew what to do with them. And since that space is merely a service area, an understood consensus was agreed upon from the point of compassion that they be allowed to stay on until they were able to fend themselves, trusting that they would leave once they were matured enough.
Days passed by quickly and it is kind of interesting just to stand at the doorway upstairs looking down to observe the many reactions toward the cats. Some passersby were oblivious to their presence, and some who were catching their breath from the two storey climb would take the opportunity to look. A few would take moments to lower themselves and stroke the cat and/or the kitties while the others who are obvious cat lovers, would hold them on their palms staying a little longer to play with them. My comrade took the initiative to purchase cat food to make sure that the feline was able to continue the lactation process for her kittens. On my role, whenever I could, I would get a pack of full cream milk which the feline loved very much.
As the kitties grew very quickly and soon were able to move around, we had to take extra care walking along that limited area, manueuvring our way to make sure not to step on them. Many a times the feline just watched quietly, resting majestically on the stairway, ignoring those who have to cross pass her.
Soon the moments came as expected when the stench of their excrement and urine became unbearable – no one thought beforehand of creating a sandbox for them. Prior to that one kitty died and it took much courage of a beloved friend to send it off. And yet another time another kitty caught the flu and the same kindred spirit brought it to the vet to administer its eyes. Nature seems to find its own way of flow, from unconditional love and motherly instinct.
To avoid the stink I fenced the grille and brought the feline and kitties to the first half landing stairway where many a times later, they managed to find their way back to their former birth place somehow. Many of us struggled within on how to address the cats as they grew bigger by each day. One of us offered to bring the cats to be neutered but there was no follow up. There was also enquiry to adopt part of the kittens but felt heart-wrenching in separating them.
Finally came the day where the earlier same kindred spirit took the initiative to send them all to the animal home. Strangely, the very day when she wanted to send them off, one of the kitty went missing. I felt sorry for it and she promised to come back to look for her another day and to reunite the lost kitty with its mother and siblings. I looked within my mind to why I was feeling so and realized it was not about anything concerning the kitty, nor was it about compassion, but rather the ancient feeling of being separated and the meaning of loneliness. Indeed strange how such feelings are deep-seated, missing the reality of what is within and projected outwardly as a sorry state drama. And to avoid and camouflage that pain I saw how the mind created stories of possibilities where a kind person may probably take the lost kitty home and take care of it well. So insidious is the mind, trying ways to repress those feelings and to finally meet it again another time when similar conditions were to arise again.
There were many lessons from these cats’ presence – from the witness and experience of being kind-hearted, courageous and responsible for living beings which can be said, totally unrelated to ourselves without expecting anything back in return; not to mention the camouflage and false appearances of seemingly good thoughts hiding ancient thoughts of pain and shame if there was no integrity and willingness to looked within the mind the moment it surfaced. How true that it is said that there is no current issues but ancient stuff brought into the present to be re-experienced.
Facing What Has Been Compromised
Posted on 13 June 2011 | No responses
a mother in serious labor pain
the girl talking on the phone, in love
the doctor breaking the news
the guy in gym, dumbbells in hand
a leader pondering the next cause of action
the child enjoying his toys
a sick stricken patient with her pain
a conversation stricken
a moment of triumph
a relationship fallout
a love making experience
or the brink of suicidal
another struggling to survive
and yet in worst scenario
the moment near death
each every occasion
no matter what the storyline
each every moment
no matter what the experience
be it fear,
loving,
confusion
joy
or sadness
yet
there is only one
a celebration of ONE
of the present Now
of how you and I
relate to what is already in our space
the experience, merely a decoy
presented once again
of compromise one has made before
coming back as another chance
of what was once
wrongly chosen
not aligning with the heart
of guilt overwhelming
returning to make good again
and yet each experience so real
making attention focused on it
amnesiac, forgetting
what will really set one free
is not the experience
but the wonderment of relate
for it is here
that compromise is found
freeing it, letting it go
the grip of holding on
one is finally set free.
for what one holds on is holding one back
returning one more time to the game of Life
the cycle of birth and death.
Ideas Rule the World
Posted on 9 June 2011 | 2 responses
Ideas are pretty funny “creatures”
for they make you believe who you think you are
they make you laugh
and you say you are happy
they make you cry
and you say you are sad
they make you care for another
and you think no one cares for you instead
But how can something that “makes” you
be “you” unless belief sets into picture?
An idea pops up and says
“I want someone to be around”
and hey presto!
another idea has to arise simultaneously
to match and balance the other
hence
“I don’t want to be alone”
is what you have
in vice versa both ideas dance
sometimes a cause
another time an effect
never leaving each other
matching and balancing itself at all times
making you seek and look for another
if you fulfill the idea then you are happy
failing which you
will feel dejected, probably sad too.
another Idea pops up and said
“let me not be selfish”
and its opposite, has to appear simultaneously
starting the ball rolling as “have to be selfless” idea
hence you move to help another
making you feel good
and surely you would have known by now
if help is not given in anyway
bad feelings will be yours
if Idea wants to be alone
hey presto!
another Idea pops up in pairing
wanting not to be disturb
but HELLO! wait a minute….
how long more do you want to serve Ideas?
never fulfilled except to want more?
and here you are exhausted playing its game
do you not see its opposite
inseparable
indivisible?
making you running around headlessly?
It is not that “you” are dejected
but the idea that “wants” something
already set in motion
another idea “do not want” to come into picture
for want and do not want
can only comes in pair
inseparable
indivisible
And hence you have to prepare
for the experience of elation or dejection
depending which,
the “want” Idea or “don’t want” Idea wins the race
Ideas make you cry
ideas make you laugh
ideas make you sad
ideas make you happy
and “you” merely a puppet on a string
pulled by its need
making you dance its way
unknown of its catch
subjugate to its play
and here you are thinking
you ARE happy
you ARE sad
except ideas laughing its way home
so funny
so ridiculous
this thing call IDEA
who are you without IDEAS?
surely you will like to know
but then again “like” is another idea again, rearing out its head….. sigh….
A U-Turn Home
Posted on 1 June 2011 | No responses
Indeed queer
indeed strange
to get caught in another’s doing
and make judgments out of it
for never once we understood our mind fully
what more of others’ act of doing!
Indeed sadness
indeed grief
to assume others’ action
making I am holier than thou
forgetting that the “I am”
is misleading me
rather than what is out there!
So easy is it to direct attention outside
difficult indeed inwards
for if outside has been the path of liberation
even monkeys, ducks or babies
would have all been enlightened
not to mention you or me
giving our attention outside
at all times?
The world terrible
the country unbearable
people evil
system unfair
there are rights
there are wrongs
rampant everywhere
but wait a minute!
wait a minute!
Ponder deeply where it is coming from!
A source so obvious and yet missed
for what is ignored cannot be seen
and hence hidden from one
as ancient as it can be.
let the Master’s voice be your guide
to lead you to see
it has never left you
for within the Mind
is found your reservoir of meanings
of bondage, of pain, of sorrow
which you have never ever left.
So halt a minute!
Pay attention!
when the Deathless Gong comes a calling
inviting you to start inquiring
as the beginning journey to God’s Home;
for if liberation is not found now
how then can it be after death?
Indeed madness
indeed stupidity…
the mind of ignorance!
Never Was
Posted on 28 May 2011 | No responses
Imagine imagine
you never knew what a mirror was
not to mention its function
never understood
what a reflection can do to you
and one day you step into one
shocked with disarray
how another you is separated
trapped in the frame
on the other side
from your side you see the limiting frame
sorry for the other “you” trapped within it
wallowing with dismay
in anger and vengeance
who brought your half in there
for a moment losing yourself
forgetting who you are
propelled into the illusion of the mirror
becoming the reflection of that limitation
you dreamt that you are that
as in awaken state
the next moment asleep
what is present becomes real
of the past all forgotten
not remembering it was just a dream
and here you find
a reflection that never was
an imagination of sort
of strange device that propels you here
of the impossible turned reality
of what is unreal becoming real
in a brief of forgetfulness
all are forgotten
but how can that be possible
to be on the other side
except a reflection
not even to mention any reality in it
not of 3 dimension or even a realm there
except an illusion
a great mystery
wake up wake up
soon a calling came
and before you knew it
awakening came a surprise
to realized it was just like a dream
a dream so darn real
yet nothing has really occurred
except a brief moment of forgetting
transported into timbuktu
if you can forget about wakeful state
being propelled into dream
having no conscious choice in it
Isn’t it the same
isn’t it possible
to forget yourself
as entering into the mirror
though never once have you left
except drowned in imagination
of unreal-turned-reality
come home to me
come home to me
as you gradually know…
it was you!
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