No World

There’s “I”
but no “I am”
and even then
the “I” is not what
I think it is.

The “I”
can’t think
can’t feel
can’t know
but simply an idea
lodged in the mind.

As like any idea
“I” is just another idea
meaningless
devoid of personality
devoid of identity
except, an idea.

No ownership
no possession
no entitlement
no belonging
no self
that exist
but merely an error
a delusion

And yet
and yet
strangely
meaning of self
springs
and the world comes to be

Consciousness knows,
not “I” know
Feeling feels,
not “I” feel
Perception perceive,
not “I” perceive

I, merely
empty
another meaningless idea.

Reversal Learning versus Forward Learning

Meditation learning is reversal – reversing what is already in existence. Learning in this sense addresses what is already here instead of creating what is other than here.

The purpose of learning meditation is to undo what has been done, not as literally, but through recognition – hence it is reversal by nature. When one is able to recognize a mistake, at that point one has already got himself released from the mistake, in word to mean correction has occurred, at the mind level. Recognition here is not anything about regret or remorse but simply a realization it was an error in the mind. Recognition is reversal in this meaning.

Whenever a mistake is made, there is a tendency of the mind to give attention to the outcome rather than the process that leads to it. My meditation teacher constantly reminds us that any experience that comes into our space is not at all important than the attitude towards it. What he is to mean is that the experience itself is none of our business, since it is already in existence, but our attitude, which is in the present, is a determining factor for our future.

Back to the example of a mistake – when you recognize a mistake, you can either give attention to the mistake, which has already occurred and probably see yourself wrong in it or, you can be grateful that you have the ability to recognize the mistake. Ignorance cries over split milk, whereas wisdom rejoices in what is learnt from the experience. In other words, ignorance look at the effect, whereas wisdom at the cause.

Ignorance carry the mistake forward by making amends through guilt, having to live with guilt, while wisdom releases the past and naturally transforms due to resolving it through understanding. The latter is a reversal learning, as it reverses what is past by making it correct and hence completing what is in the past and then move on, whereas the former carries the past forward, not resolving it at all, except proliferating it further by constant guilt.

When one recognizes a mistake, one has to give attention to the recognition itself rather than the mistake. The recognition is the cause of undoing the mistake. Without recognition, correction is impossible. Recognition is wisdom at work. Question may arise what about one who has yet to see it as a mistake? Then it is obvious that wisdom has not come in or ignorance is just around covering the truth to be seen. A mistake will not be called a mistake until one recognizes it which already means a correction has been made, in the mind. Without the arising of the correction, a mistake cannot be seen, hence the meaning ignorance – ignoring the obvious.

One may ask further what about justice when the mistake has been done upon another, in term of retribution. Retribution is again, a forward learning as it entails guilt. In truth, justice has been carried out in the mind as every moment of unseen mistake, by itself it already entails much suffering to the beholder. Anything that is against nature is by itself suffering, without needing to impose further suffering. This truth applies at the mind level and what the world does to the person is another issue all together, as again, the world is in constant conflict with the Truth.

The law of nature is just, except man made laws as it addresses the effect rather than the cause. All issues can only be addressed at the cause level if a permanent resolution is to be made.

Wake Up!

If I was to tell you to just let go
you wouldn’t understand
what I am trying to convey
for your holding on is so deep
that you have totally forgotten
you are still gripping
in pain.

And what I can only do is
to watch you gripping in pain
without you realizing.

What can I do?
How can I help?
When one is not awake
from his dream
except to wait
for the right moment
to gently coax him
to wake;
even then
when will be the moment
when will be the time?

I can leave each
to his own waking up
or to watch in vain
while they are asleep
dreaming

What can I do?
How can I help?
Except to watch helplessly
except to give a little coaxing
except to give a little understanding
trusting that one day
one fine day
when conditions ripen
you will surely wake up
from the long overdue
dream.

Hold Until One Wakes Up

We pretty well know by now that our senses are working itself irrelevant we give specific attention to them or not. In fact we also know that we cannot be aware of all senses at one time unless we are still enough to recognize them working together at the same time.

Hence when we introduce awareness into the moment, we are simply bringing awareness to what is already here working itself. The purpose of awareness is to bring recognition to what is naturally unfolding right here right now. In brief, the more one is aware without interferring the object of observation, one learns to recognize that nature is taking place in the senses. There is no “I” there so to speak. “I am doing” is just a notion of an illusionary self projected outward by the mind. But when one is not present to the mind, one identifies with this notion and hence took on the “I” identity.

It is amazing and strange how this mind works. By itself it is nature, unfolding itself out with the ability to feel, conscious, perceive etc without any effort of “someone” taking charge of it. But when an idea is introduced into the mind, the idea which in the beginning was just an idea, as the word implies, becomes real. The mind makes what is meaningless into meaning.

It is just like movies we see on screens nowadays. In the past, 3D movies are unheard off, not to mention its potential presence. Nowadays with the advancement of cinema graphics what was once unreal becomes so real that you cannot differentiate whether they are created on computers or really occurring during the shoot.

That is exactly what the mind does, making what is unreal or meaningless into real with meaning in it. But with wisdom when one takes a closer look at the mind, one will be surprised by the illusions it is able to create.

The more you see the mind’s illusionary nature, the more you start to see the opposite of what you call real at this moment. It is moving from what was once perceived real back to its reality of unrealness. In other words when we come closer to reality of Truth, we go against the flow of the world. The world is created out of unrealness and to realize the Truth is to see the reality of unrealness of the world.

For one who holds so firmly to the form will sure find this concept frightening. It is only frightening because our belief system is based on the unreal, real that we have not woken up from. Once slowly and surely the call for awakening is to knock on our door, our grip on this illusion will slowly fade and we start to free ourselves again from the bondage we held on to, which in reality was not there at all.

It is exactly like waking up from the dream to realize that nothing actually had happened. But meanwhile everything around you, be it your loved ones, your beloved, your lover, your enemy, your possession, your identity, in short anything that has “your” in it, is real for now. If I were to tell you now to just let go and hold one no more, you will be unable to do it as the unreal is so darn real, to you!

So there is nothing much I could do for you except to realize that the time has not come up for you, at least for now…

“Using” the Mind to Know the Mind

The mind has been conditioned to think through our daily needs and anything that has been conditioned for a long time, will run on its own momentum, as if having a life of its own.  It takes a little effort and continuity to end that process. But understanding the way the mind works, its nature is such that something has to continue in it – there is no such a thing as a mind being blank.

As such a replacement will help to eliminate, if not reduce, unnecessary thinking. One can either replace it with awareness, by not forgetting to be in the present, or taking up the habit of observing what the mind is doing. Both techniques are useful as it grounds our attention back into the moment. You will observe that most of the unnecessary thinking has little to do with what is in the present. It is constantly either in the past or future.

Starting a fresh habit can be quite a pain, considering that what is being addicted to for so long has difficulty to change. Thus instead of trying to change the habit, try having the attitude of learning to watch the mind. Inject curiosity. Give it an interest to be aware or observe instead of trying to fix up the mind.

In this way, your approach becomes towards the direction of right attitude instead of wrong. By itself, incessant thinking is already a wrong attitude and using wrong attitude only makes the situation worse. One of the natural ways to inject curiosity into the mind is through questioning. The mind on its own nature directs itself through the question one poses. Of course, intelligent directed question is necessary if you wish the mind to follow. The mind is constantly in the know, even while it doesn’t know, as it knows it doesn’t know! Using this simple understanding, you direct the mind to where you wish it to go. Hence the purpose of the question is to bring about curiosity to know where or what the mind is doing. Its purpose is by no means to get an answer. It is more of an inquiry rather than questioning.

Imagine giving a question to the mind, say, where is the floor? Even without considering for a moment or even having the question completed, the mind already knows where it is. Are you aware of that? And if you pose a question that you are totally familiar already, which is an impossible task save being asked by someone, your mind will immediately come with a “don’t know” answer. It is only your lingering thought trying to figure out what the question is all about that probably disallows you to know that the mind already has an answer. That’s the nature of how the mind works.

Hence working on this nature of the mind is using it to check the mind. You may ask questions like, what is the mind doing? This will direct the mind to know itself. In the beginning you may find it difficult to know what the mind is doing. The trick is that you need not know what the mind is doing, the mind already knows. Again, it is your thinking that disallows being answered, which is already there, to be known. Hence each question posed is not for you to know or to get an answer but for the mind to go to where you had asked it. So probably you may have awareness coming back with, the mind is listening, or hearing, or thinking, or even imagining, or day dreaming.

It takes a little effort but the effort will be fruitful to reduce the unnecessary thinking mind. Long enough, you will develop a new habit of constant presence of what the mind is up to!

Wisdom Knew!

It is the mind!
It is the mind!
Wisdom exclaims
in jubilation.

Everything is the mind!
Everything is the mind!
Wisdom realized.

“I” is part of an idea
of the mind
instead of I am the mind.

Suddenly
inside looking out
becomes
outside looking in
as if what was once
outside
now becomes the inside
and vice versa
but that too is not true
as there was no
inside or outside
except
the Mind!

The “I”
once the reference point
now becomes
part of the
peripheral.

It is the mind!
It is the mind!
Wisdom knew!

Wisdom & Ignorance, A Vast Difference

To make a distinction between ignorance and wisdom is liken to compare between wearing glasses with a clear lens with one that has its index distorted. There is an obvious difference, and hence one can be sure whence wisdom is around due to its high contrast in comparison to ignorance.

And for one who has never realized with wisdom a particular situation will never understand how the point of view can differ so greatly, more so when emotion is displayed obviously between one who is wise and another who is not. And it is never possible to explain, save to show, another who has yet to realize the truth of the situation. Truth of the situation is not about trying to proof another right or wrong, but as a matter of fact – a fact that is unchanged, irrelevant of time, space or storyline – it is about the essence of the situation rather than the storyline itself.

Two ignorants conversing can be painful if both are trying to convince each other as wrong, each thinking themselves as wise. One ignorant with another wise can too be a pain if the ignorant who never understood where the wise is coming from, tries to convince if not argue his point of view, while the wise looking at the other in compassion, realizing the impossibility to explain, except to keep silent.

What makes such a distinction, one may ask? Both ignorant and the wise are coming from a different level of understanding, like a scientist trying to make a person see water as H20 without any prior information whatsoever. Both can be seeing the same thing, but seeing it differently. One obvious distinction is that an ignorant looks at a situation from the past even though he may not be aware of it, whereas the wise looks at the situation in the now, from the level of essence, of what is in actuality a fact occurring in the mind. One may say the ignorant looks at the effect of a situation, whereas the wise is able to see the entire causal relationship, as in cause and effect, of how the situation comes about.

Having the entire picture makes a complete truth of what has actually occurred rather than the danger of half a truth as that may become an assumption, which most of the time, makes an ass out of the situation. For instance, the act of generosity can be seen as a wholesome act as a result of outward appearance – arising from a perceived observation of what occurred… But if one was to watch the mind carefully, the meaning of generosity may not be present, though giving is being done physically, as behind that act itself is its own ulterior motive that taints the true meaning of generosity. The ability to see both its cause and its effect is wisdom at work. To explain this to an ignorant can at times lead to argument of why one needs to be so meticulous. But the matter of fact is not in the experience but realization; how if not understood, will only lead to the proliferation of defilements, or taints, in the mind of the giver, not giving at all, but in actuality, seeking.

In short, a mind of wisdom sees reality, with realization, whereas one with ignorant sees only delusion, not realizing it.