Just came back from watching the movie Avatar. The computer graphics are superb – beyond words and expression. While enjoying the movie, something strikes me deeply – both the human and avatar world reflects my inner world – the egoic and the wise.
The ego has a destructive and wastage nature. It could not help not doing that for that’s its nature. So long as I am unaware of its nature I will express exactly what the ego is. I can’t not be angry while I am angry unless for that instant the wise part of me wakes up from that dream. I can’t not be destructive either. My greed for more and the aversion for not getting what I desire is in constant calling. This is my dream. I am the dreamwalker in this world of fear until I get a wakeup call away from this dream.
In this dream, the world I perceive is dangerous and harmful. I see everyone taking advantage of me, as if attacking my vulnerability. For that I have to keep defending myself not to be hurt mentally or emotionally. I am holding an invisible mask of pretense most of the time. I am never at peace, constantly on alert, putting up a looking-good front. I avoid conflicts to protect myself. I am in constant lack, wanting more and amassing more. I am numb to stress as it becomes a part of me. My self-security is easily triggered and threatened by things around me.
Whenever I wake-up from this dream, the world does not seems to be what I thought. This world and the other seems in perfect opposite. Everything is possible, and there is a feeling of abundance everywhere. In this space there is simplicity – everyone is simply perfectly who they are. Their anger is just an expression of calling for love. Their desire is an expression of needing to be understood. They are just yet to wake-up, and there is no hurry, for their time will come. For me, there is just eyes of compassion, of love for everything. There is no eagerness to reach anywhere. There is contentment in each moment of being. Freedom and love is my essence. There is an infinite intelligence in this essence. and healing is its property.
The language I speak comes from understanding. Every word I express is from the level of authenticity. There is no harboring of fear or pretense except openness and love. Every experience is an experience of wisdom.
I am toggling in both worlds and I saw myself more in the wake-up world. The reverse seems to be occurring. The dream in my sleep is more stressful. Which is real?