Rely on the message of the teacher, not on his personality;
Rely on the meaning, not just on the words;
Rely on the real meaning, not on the provisional one;
Rely on your wisdom mind, not on your ordinary, judgmental mind.
– The Buddha
Am I Ignoring the Obvious?
Ideas rule the world. So long as there is a mind, it is subjected to ideas. All thoughts and perceptions are conditioned by ideas, resulting and reinforcing future ideas. If the beginning ideas are wrong-mindedness, what follows are wrong in all aspects, until right-mindedness intervenes, correcting the erroneous views. Wrong-mindedness leads to dis-ease, right-mindedness leads to freedom and peace.
There is no possibility of non-idea, as that itself too is an idea. When I say I don’t have any idea, I am to mean my idea of that time is not coherent with what is at that moment. My existence is based on ideas. And as I observed my ideas closely, I am amused by the predictable events that come with it. For instant, the experience I had when I opened the car boot after my usual morning walk. I have this idea that the car boot is unclean. This unclean idea makes me feel uneasy when people are passing by the car, worrying how they will judge me. When I have the idea that it is unclean, I am already seeing it as wrong. And each wrong will be balanced by the right – it should be cleaned, it should not be seen, it should not happened. Now the mind is in conflict, fighting between having it cleaned and embarrassed by the uncleanness. Well, to resolve this conflict I just have to clean the car. Is that true? If it is true, then I will no longer be bothered by the issue of uncleanliness in the future – but it does not work that way, as I will have to keep cleaning it so as to put uncleanliness at bay. Is there any difference between this and the former? The only difference is that I like cleanliness and dislike uncleanliness. Both are targeting at the same object, not seeing that my idea is the culprit that makes me do this and that – never at peace with myself. It is an addiction. An addiction of doing and doing. My unaware interpretation begins the drama of my storyline.
I may not realize what I am experiencing as uneasiness, as I am continuously addicted to rectifying what I think should and should not be. I should keep the house clean, I should not be complacent, I should do something, I should not rest, I should see my parents, I should not do these or do that. And my should goes further than just me – you should not have dirtied the place, you should apologize, you should have drive carefully, you should mixed with friends, you should, you should. you should. The should is occurring within me, not what is truly out there. I bought in an idea and that idea conflicts me. If my idea comes from right-mindedness I can be sure there wont be any conflict or dis-ease.
Throughout the day there are amazingly countless of ideas interacting and bridging me with the world. The world too brings in ideas that may influence my ideas, either strenghtening or weakening what I am already in. If I am not open to inquiries, what I accept will matches my own ideas. Whatever that is detrimental to my ideas will be automatically rejected.
Ideas too are subjected to the check and balance principle. Each wrong idea has the potential for right idea to spring forth. The way of right idea arising is by the triggers that I get from wrong-mindedness. It is a calling for the correction of an error. I may or may not listen to that call. But it is ok. The more I ignore, the more I will face the trigger until I take time to inquire. Thus nature is benevolent. Each trigger is a rectification of an error. It is by no means a punishment but a benevolent act of Nature bringing me back to peace.
It has the balance of ying and yang in Tao. When I am too ying, I will be attracted to yang and viceversa. When I attack, I am subjected to defense. When I defense, I am subjected to attack. They are interplay of duality, occurring every moment. Am I in-charge? No. I am been pulled by the forces of Nature. My control only seems to make Nature is going against me. In truth it is me that is against Nature.
Nature of Existence is Non-existence
Everything in existence has its own check and balance processes – a natural law that governs everything that exist, from the micro to the macro level, including the universe itself. It is like an in-build mechanism found in everything – whether be it tangible or intangible, animate or inanimate – all has the inherent nature to arise and cease by itself, moment after moment. Conditioned by its ceasing, it arises again. Conditioned by the arising, it ceases again, in continuum. This conditional principle is spread unconditionally throughout existence – not one is spared from it.
There is no wrongness in this movement of processes, neither is there possibility of things going wrong – for everything, from the minutest level, is taken care of in itself, moment after moment, in perfect harmony. How could it ever go wrong when anything that comes into existence perishes immediately? There is no chance for it to move further into any conflict or entanglement other than to cease instantaneously. If ever there is an entanglement, it will only be a perceived entanglement occurring between ego towards nature. Even the mind is subjected to perish – how else could it be possible for it to be entangled? The misconception of what things really are from the viewpoint of ego is the cause of the illusion of entanglement. What is ego? Misperception.
On a wider perspective, these conditioned states are what we called Nature – they are the natural workings of existence. Conditioned states are unconditional by nature as it goes beyond all forms, without any exception. It is like implying that the only permanence is impermanent itself. When I am in the space of stillness, of beingness, of surrendering – all not exempted from change itself – the flow of this nature is experienced – the natural state of change, of impermanence, occuring at all levels, including awareness itself. These phenomenon of change can be directly experience as something that is devoid of self, of doing. It is not something I can hold on to, as holding on itself is subjected to change too. Thus in existence there is not a permanent entity that can be called the same at any moment. Observing and understanding this nature is wisdom at work – a kind of experiential realization.
Do “I” really exist? Yes and no. Not as a permanent entity, but as Nature – subjected to the conditioning of arising and perishing, moment after moment. Consciousness, perceptions, feelings or mental formations, perish as it arise, and conditioned by perish, it arise again.
Like a dream, I cannot say it does not exist, neither is it in existence. Only when I do not understand and realized the principle behind these experiences that I took it personal – and from that arises the misperception of control; of holding on and resistance – all springing from the ignorance of this nature. That is where delusion works.