Illusion to Reality

The flow of the river is benevolent, finding its own pathways and levels wherever it arrives, irrespective of what obstacles or blocks that is in front of it. I like to imagine Nature as such. Nature is benevolent, balancing itself in ways I could imagined and whatever shortsightedness I have upon Nature is not what Nature is expressing ultimately. I have been shown again and again to trust and surrender to Nature, for Nature knows best.

If I am traveling on the river, I will be moving according to the way Nature flows and for that I don’t see the river as as a threat to my journey. But for a moment if I am adamant and wish to turn towards the opposite direction of the river flow, suddenly I am been given the impression that the river is moving against me. I will not be able to recognize that it was my own doing that go against Nature that brought about the meaning of Nature going against me. I am at fault with nature, so to speak.

Nature is what is. The same too with all the experiences that is flowing in my life – anything that comes to me through my five bodily senses – be it seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting and touching – they are all Nature. When I don’t see experiences as Nature I am in fact going against what is – I desire other than what is, I resist other than what is; I desire for what is, I resist for what is – either one, I am against Nature. For Nature cannot be stopped, control or fixed according to my whim and fancy. I can actually do whatever I want, but it does change Nature at all. What changes is only my perception of Nature, not Nature itself. For that I am in error with Nature.

Imagine a scene of me requesting my wife for a comment of what I have just designed. The moment I seek for comment, I am already meaning that I need another person’s approval. Thus if the comment is not to my approval, I will see her as a threat against my needs. I don’t see her action as what is – that whatever she speaks, she is speaking from her own point of view and I can never know what it is. If her comment is supportive of my need for approval, I am also moving against Nature – as I perceived that Nature is flowing with me rather than I am flowing with Nature. Whichever way I come from an idea that is against Nature, I will be misinterpreting what Nature is offering me for my highest good.

Look at the mind as Nature too – I can’t know what mood it is offering me. Neither can I tell what feelings I am into the next moment except to welcome what is already here for me to experience at each moment. There is no way I can change the course of the mind as the mind too is Nature. If I am upset – the sooner I accept my upset, the faster I come into peace with myself. If I try to hide my upset, I will be creating a reservoir of flow which will be overwhelming in proportion in due time. If I indulge with upset by hitting out at others, I am forcing Nature to move at a certain direction, which is an impossible task. I thought I may have won the game of deception, but whom I deceived is only myself, except colored by my own perception. Again Nature is benevolent. It does not teach me a lesson by going against me except I will see my own folly in due time for what I have deceived myself.

If I truly wish Nature to teach me lessons, I just have to surrender and flow with it, which includes my mind and body too. Then can I truly experience what peace and freedom Nature can offer.

Lately I observed a queer pattern going on in the mind – if I give specialness to something, making everything other than that as non-special, the result I get from that something will be a love-hate relationship. Why is it so? So I put on the wisdom telescope into the ocean of the mind and investigate and this is what I found…

Everything that comes to me is in 100% perfection – whether I call it a flaw or a misfit. What is, is what is. It is only when the mind complaints that I see the thing that is for me, as imperfect. The mind is rather unwise, not recognizing that what is, is what is. So there is an invisible boundary going on between the mind and the world – both are not in sync. I can’t make the world in sync with the mind, but whether I like it or not, the mind has to be in sync with the world – else what I get is stress and disease.

So what comes to me at each every moment, is what is. If I term sound as either noise or music, it does not make sound different. What is different is in my experience. What I perceive is exactly what I get. There is no other way than what is. Thus if I put meaning to the sound, which is not exactly as what nature is offering me, I will experience exactly what I put in – 100% to what I give into it.

Thus if I placed special relationship to a certain music, I will be annoyed when others do not jive with what I think it should be. Not just that, if the music is been remixed, I will be annoyed with it too. If I have a special relationship with a word, I will see others as an attack when they “misused my word”. If I have a special relationship with my spouse, I will see anyone that approaches her as a threat.  I too will see her as a threat if what I perceived in her is not exactly what she is going to express.

Whenever there is a love specialness in anything, there is sure to be hate specialness in it too. Thus my annoyance has nothing at all to do with the world. I created my meaning, and I have to experience what I have created. There is no other way than that. To keep seeing the world as wrong only compound my misery. The more I protect myself, the more I see the world as an enemy. I can keep on going attacking and defending, but it is a futile war – the war will only ends when I come to peace with what I have given out.

For that I call for mercy, not to an external force, but mercy in me for seeing things as they truly are.

What I give is exactly what I get in return – 100% all the time.

Many great Masters of the past talks about letting go and surrendering. And many who followed did and yet many failed. How to surrender, the question were asked. Letting go of what? Surrendering to what? And many sort themselves out by trying – by giving up wealth, giving up materials, giving up life, giving up practically everything and still find themselves miserable. I read Illusions by Richard Bach a year ago and find the parable enlightening….

Once there lived a village of creatures along the bottom of a great crystal river. The current of the river swept silently over them all- young and old, rich and poor, good and evil, the current going its own way, knowing only its own crystal self.

Each creature in its own manner clung tightly to the twigs and rocks of the river bottom, for clinging was their way of life, and resisting the current what each had learned from birth. But one creature said at last, “I am tired of clinging. Though I cannot see it with my eyes, I trust that the current knows where it is going. I shall let go, and let it take me where it will. Clinging, I shall die of boredom.”

The other creatures laughed and said, “Fool! Let go, and that current you worship will throw you tumbled and smashed across the rocks and you will die quicker than boredom!” But the one heeded them not, and taking a breath did let go, and at once was tumbled and smashed by the current across the rocks.

Yet in time, as the creature refused to cling again, the current lifted him free from the bottom, and he was bruised and hurt no more. And the creatures downstream, to whom he was a stranger, cried, “See a miracle! A creature like ourselves, yet he flies! See the Messiah, come to save us all!”

And the one carried in the current said, “I am no more Messiah than you. The river delights to lift us free, if only we dare let go. Our true work is this voyage, this adventure.” But they cried the more, “Savior!” all the while clinging to the rocks, and when they looked again he was gone, and they were left alone making legends of a Savior.”

– Richard Bach, Illusions – The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah

What am I still holding on? What is it that I am clinging to? The world is my reflection…